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There
have been many times that I have been driving to a place that is so
familiar that I don’t seem to need to use my brain to get there. Upon
arrival, it’s almost scary that I don’t remember the details of
getting there.
All
I am aware of is the starting place and ending place but none of the
probably mundane details in between. This kind of thing can happen to us
in life.
I
think all of us experience things like this, for better or for worse.
These things are usually hard to see in ourselves but easier to see in
someone else. This summer I saw such a transformation in Josh, my youngest
son.
Thinking
about Josh made me wonder if a similar transformation ever happened to my
oldest son, Dustin, and realized that he also had a similar experience.
Dustin had played baseball from age six and was quite good at it I
thought. When he moved up the 13-14 age bracket, our community team was
loaded with a good group of 14 year olds. The coach told the 13 year olds
that they could be on the team if they wanted to be, but it would be all
practice and little playing time. This didn’t appeal to Dustin and he
went to work after school and during the summer on my uncle’s cattle
farm.
Life
was good, he was saving some money plus buying some things he wanted. A
kid can go a long ways on $3.00 an hour. He was so pleased with this
arrangement that one day he told me, "Dad, I don’t think I’ll
ever want to play baseball again, I’d rather work." I explained to
him that he had the rest of his life to work but if he ever wanted to play
baseball, he had better do it now. He did go back to playing baseball, but
three years working on my uncle’s farm developed a work ethic that has
paid huge dividends since. The money was not much, but the experience has
proved to be priceless.
The
change in Josh began just as subtle. I was asked to represent the Co-op by
cooking for a trail ride in the Bankhead Forest to benefit St. Jude
Children’s Hospital in April of 2003. When Josh learned of this, he
asked if he could ride in it. The organizer of the ride brought an extra
horse for Josh to ride and the fever had begun.
Josh
wanted a horse but I couldn’t see buying a horse for what might be just
a passing whim. We were fortunate to have a neighbor (Ray) who owned
horses and trained horses for others and was glad for Josh to ride some of
those horses. Josh was on the basketball team during the winter and on the
golf team in the spring so there wasn’t much time for riding. His
interest seemed to have dwindled and I thought how right I was not to buy
a horse.
He
did have time to play computer games, watch TV and get on the computer
sending and receiving "instant messages" over the internet. This
reminded me so much of the craze of about thirty years ago when grown men
would sit for hours in their pickup truck parked in their yard talking on
CB radios. They would talk to people they didn’t even know, people they
would have barely spoken to if met face to face and surely would not have
gone to the trouble to use the phone to call them. They assigned
themselves funny names and would get on the CB to call their friend by his
funny name. "Got your ears on, good buddy?" It is amazing how
similar CB’s are to the internet instant messaging. These are the kind
of things that now consumed Josh’s spare time.
After
golf season was over, Josh began to wander over to Ray’s horse barn
again. Soon it was an everyday thing for him to be there riding horses. He
even got his own horse riding "gig." Ray’s father-in-law had a
mare that he wanted trained and offered to pay Josh to ride it on a
regular basis. Besides riding horses, Josh also got a job helping Ray roof
houses. Every teenager should be this lucky; some bundles of shingles that
he carried up the ladder weighed nearly ninety pounds. Josh’s normal
routine was now getting up about 5:00 a.m., helping roof houses, riding
horses and coming home around 10:00 p.m. or after to go to bed.
Josh
began showing the mare he was working with in some horse shows. The first
show he entered was the first show ever for him and the mare. He entered
two events and came in dead last in each.
No
one with any competitive spirit would be happy with that and Josh wasn’t
either. I explained that last is where everyone starts and he should just
work for progress each week and that progress would not always be measured
in where he placed that week.
He
soon began to move up in the placing. After about six shows, he even got a
first place. He is now preparing for the state AOHA championship show in
Montgomery in early September.
When
my wife and I started going to the horse shows, the thing that we heard
from parents many times is how pleased they are that their children are
involved. It is something that families can do together. They know where
their children are and what they are doing.
Now
there is not much time for TV, computer games or the internet. Josh still
works with the mare he’s showing and also the horse he bought and has
helped to break. He reminds me of my driving; I look at him and wonder how
and when he got from where he was to where he is now.
School
has recently started back. Why on the ninth of August? I could only hope
they started back early so they can get out for a six week period in
September and October so the kids can pick cotton by hand. That would be
good for him also.
Darrell
Thompson is the manager of Lawrence County Exchange in Moulton. |
